YOUR 15 MINUTES: Sheep and Teddy Bears and Spray Painted Goats...Oh My!

Will someone blog for me while I contact the Center for Missing and Exploited Creativity to file a report on my missing creativity and its fraternal twin Ambition? I need a vacation. In the meantime, here are some entertaining stories about crazy people and animals...you can't make this stuff up:

Tonya Marie Taylor, 24, of Bono, AR is facing a felony charge for breaking and entering, after she reached into the open window of a car and stole a 3-year-old's teddy bear faces Jonesboro police said Tuesday. Police were called to the parking lot of a video store, where the child's mother reported the theft. The woman said she was sitting with her toddler daughter when Taylor approached."(Taylor) leaned into the car and grabbed a stuffed bear from the child's arms and started walking away," the woman told police in an affidavit. The mother told officers that Taylor may not have noticed there was an adult in the car until after she leaned into the vehicle. The woman told police she confronted Taylor, who ran to a vehicle and drove away with the bear. Others near the scene identified Taylor to police. On Friday, Taylor brought the bear to the police department and had a witness with her. "(Taylor) claimed she found the bear on the parking lot and that the witness could back her up," Detective Mike Branscum wrote in an affidavit. "When police got ready to get a written statement from the witness, she refused to give one." Taylor didn't offer a reason for taking the bear. I can offer a reason though...two of them: she's either crazy or developmentally delayed (I don't use the r word but it would probably sound better here). [source]

David Watts, kept about 80 sheep in his crumbling house in Apex, a Raleigh suburb, police said. "He lives upstairs and the sheep were living downstairs," police Sgt. Robert Towell said. "He considered them pets."Watts even walked some of the sheep around the neighborhood on a leash. Lambs were apparently kept inside, while grown sheep were kept outside in debris-filled pens, said Dr. Kelli Ferris, a veterinarian who examined the sheep. Workers found sheep eating plastic bags and artificial flowers from a nearby cemetery. "We're always saddened when we see animals kept in this kind of state," Ferris said. "It could have been prevented." About 30 sheep were euthanized because of poor health, said Michael Williams, director of the Wake County Animal Care, Control and Adoption Center. "A lot of times well-intentioned people get in over their head," Lewis said. Neighbors have long complained about the sheep. "All I want is to be able to sit on my front porch and not smell sheep poop," said Angie Fowler, who lives across the street. As many as 30 healthy sheep could be available for adoption, officials said. Anyone interested? I hear some of them are housetrained and can walk on a leash. It's a new celebrity pet trend, I swear. [source]

A man broke into a barn on Thanksgiving morning, spray-painted three pet goats and scattered pages of pornographic magazines on the floor, apparently to harass the property owner, police said Tuesday. Drew Gagnon, 37, of Mahopac, was arrested the next day and was charged with burglary, criminal trespass and animal cruelty, said Lt. Brian Karst, of the Carmel police force, which covers Mahopac. The man who drove Gagnon to the barn, Douglas Bisio, 34, of Mahopac, was charged with criminal facilitation, police said. "Obviously it's not an occurrence you see every day," Karst said. "I think it was a situation where this harassment got out of hand." This week, criminal charges have been dropped against the man. Drew Gagnon, 37, was charged with burglary and animal cruelty after the November incident. Douglas Bisio, 34, who police said drove Gagnon to the barn, was charged with criminal facilitation. Gagnon and Bisio agreed Monday to give $1,000 apiece to the Putnam Humane Society in exchange for the charges being dropped, said Lisa Laquidara, the clerk at Carmel Town Court. The goats' owner, Bryce Fiero, offered to withdraw the charges in exchange for the donations, saying, "My family and I just want to put this ordeal behind us and we believe that a donation to the Humane Society would be helpful." Gagnon and Bisio also agreed to stay away from the Fiero farm, which is about 50 miles north of New York City, said their lawyer, Christopher Maher. Police said at the time that the spray-painting appeared to be part of a harassment campaign but did not elaborate. A veterinarian said the goats became sick after eating the magazine pages but all recovered. The vet, Stacey Dallas, also said the orange paint was on their genitals. I'm still trying to figure out why - does he not like goats? Was he protesting porn, goat porn, spray paint, the color orange??? Trying to start a new orange goat ball trend? Is goat graffiti gaining popularity in NY? Was he molested by a goat as a child? [source]