Blow-han better have a damn good Blue Cross policy

Lindsay Blow-han needs hire a personal ambulance driver because that bitch goes to the hospital like once a week. Apparently Lindsay was hanging out at Bryan Adams’ mansion in London and she slipped on some stairs and cut her shin. Sounds simple enough, right? Well here’s the story her mom told the press:

"She and her friends were preparing breakfast, with eggs and everything, and Lindsay was going up the stairs, carrying a ceramic teacup," Dina explains to Star. "She had just come out of the shower so she was still wet and had some lotion on, and she completely flipped on the stairs since it was slippery. The teacup went flying, it was shattered, and one of the pieces cut Lindsay in her shin. It was an accident.”

Wow Dina…that’s a lot of explaining for one little accident and that story just doesn’t add up. Don’t people normally dry off after the shower and then make breakfast? Doesn’t the lotion go on after you dry? A piece of a teacup can cause you to get ten stitches? What 19 year-old hangs out with Bryan Adams? Oh, and the worst part is that it was a ceramic teacup…not even porcelain or bone china.

See, I’m no stranger to freak accidents. I accidentally super glued my eye shut once. Here’s how the story goes: I was in high school and I was highly misinformed that acrylic nails were cool. One of my acrylic nails popped off. I tried to glue it on while I was talking on the phone and the superglue squirted out into my eye. See how easy and believable that was.

God only knows what Lindsay was doing but I’m pretty sure it had nothing to do with breakfast, eggs, lotion and a teacup.

[source]