Winner: Most Random Story-of-the-Day

Jeffrey Fulvimari, the artist responsible for the artwork of Madonna's children's book, The English Roses, was hospitalized over the weekend after being BEAT THE FUCK UP while leaving a trendy nightclub early Sunday morning in NYC.

He's being treated at a local hospital and is said to be undergoing reconstructive surgery on his left eye socket after being beaten and kicked.

"I'm lucky I don't have brain damage or hearing damage."

I feel 10 times dumber for having written this story...

[source]