Simply A Waste Of Time

Paris and Nicole’s stint on the Simple Life has been renewed for a sixth season now making the show six seasons too long. If E! was so desperate for shows, I have a few that would be more entertaining that two dumbasses acting like dumbasses:

1. A reality show with a few of my crazy friends: it's basically a mixture of home decorating and assorted pharmaceuticals/alcohol. While were doing the home improvements Dino and I would talk about celebrity gossip. And as usual, every show would end up with everyone naked in the shower.
2. A show where I stand on my head balance a stick on my ass and then Dino stacks plates on the stick and we see how many I can balance. Then we just keep doing it every week until the season ends.
3. A reality show on the opening of my very first gourmet grilled cheese restaurant.
4. Trailer makeovers based on rooms in celebrity homes.
5. Last but not least, add me to the cast of the Simple Life. Trust me, it would be far more entertaining.

In related news, Paris Hilton is quoted as saying the Paris she plays on TV is a character she created and is nothing like the real Paris:

"Before I started the show I thought I'd make a character like the movies Legally Blonde and Clueless mixed together, with a rich girl all-in-one," she explained. "Even my voice is different and the way I dress is different from me in real life. It's a character I like to play. I think it's carefree and happy. The public think they know me but they really don't."

So how is that different from the real Paris? Basically, Paris is so deluded that she thinks she’s Karen Walker/Megan Mullally from Will and Grace. [source]