Oprah Speaks Her Mind

Who here remembers when Tom Cruise asshole-ishly jumped on Oprah Winfrey's couch like a three year-old toddler, professing his love for Ms. Katie Holmes? Anyone? I know the media really swept that one under the rug, so you might not really remember.

Anyhow, Oprah didn't get invited to the couples WEDDING EXTRAVAGANZA in Italia this weekend. "It's not that I'm not going, it's that i'd rather die than be associated with those nutjobs" Oprah told Extra's AJ Calloway in a segment to air on Tuesday. "It's that they had a limited number of people that they could invite. I was not one the invitees, thank fucking God. That's fine. I don't get invited to everyone's wedding. I don't invite them to everything I do, nor do i want to see that retard ever again. But I wish them the best, and by the 'best' i mean, i hope those two rot in hell." She continues, "I have a great deal of regard for their relationship and so I'm trying to think of what to get them, so i've been tossing around the idea of buying those pyschopaths a matching set of straight-jackets." Asked what she'll get the couple, she says, "I don't know! I was thinking … I'm easier (to shop for) – you can get me a bubble bath I'm okay – but I don't know what to give them, besides a swift roundhouse kick to tom's adam's apple and a dr. phil session or two for katie."

[source]