YOUR 15 MINUTES: Tranny for Parliament

The man formerly known as Wladimiro Guadagno, the organizer of Italy’s gay pride parades and star of an upcoming film (playing a Neopolitan transvestite who enters politics), wants to be taken serious…as a real-life politician for Italy’s main communist party. Vladimir Luxuria, as this transgender drag queen likes to be called, is ditching her feather boas and cabaret costumes for pantsuits and politics. If she wins a seat in April’s election, which she’s almost guaranteed to do, she will be the first transgender to get into Parliament in Europe. Luxuria is quoted as saying “It’s a way to say to people: don’t judge me by the way I look, don’t judge me by my sexual orientation. Please, judge me by my ideas. Parliament is not a theatre, it’s not a discotheque. It’s already revolutionary that a transgender gets into parliament. It wouldn’t be useful to provoke in such a stupid way.” Luxuria will be working to establish full legal recognition of civil unions for homosexual couples.

Although members of the government’s Northern League party frequently speak out about what they see as a treat posed by “faggots” (their word, not mine). Luxuria jokes that she already has something in common with the current government -- Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi, wears lifts on his shoes to make him appear taller. She says, “He wears make-up, like me, maybe a little bit less but he does. He wears heels, so sometimes, at least aesthetically we have more in common than he would think.” (…ahhh, grasshopper, it’s not that easy. Somehow conservative man wearing high heels and makeup is much easier for conservative society to handle than liberal man dressing like woman in heels and makeup.)

For just one second I wish she’d ditch that orange suit, throw on some sequins and a bouffant wig and sashay around Parliament with her own version of Right Said Fred’s “I’m Too Sexy” playing in the background. “And I'm too sexy for Milan too sexy for Milan, New York and Japan. And I'm too sexy for your Northern League party. Too sexy for your Northern League party. No way I'm disco dancing! I'm a politician you know what I mean and I give my little vote in the parliament.” Ok I'm getting carried away... no transgender commie jokes here, I think it’s refreshing to see someone a little different than the traditional suit-and-tie politician legitimately try to make a difference. At least she’s not pulling a Mary Carey, the porn star who ran for California’s governor. Her platform consisted of deep, social/political issues such as taxing breast implants, making lap dances tax deductible and wiring the governors mansion with live webcams. If I were an Italian communist in her jurisdiction I’d vote vote vote for Luxuria! That just sounds fabulous. “Vote for Luxuria.” "Luxuria for Parliament" …I’m sure it sounds even more fabulous in Italian.
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