Wednesday, April 26, 2006

YOUR 15 MINUTES: Serial Barfer

Just in time for lunch -- here's an interesting story for a ripped-from-the-headlines CSI:

Sheriff's deputies in Henry County (Iowa) are stuck in the middle of a less than appetizing investigation. Investigators are trying to find the person who has dumped bags of what appears to be human vomit in ditches in a 1 1/2-mile area northeast of the city. Deputy Dan Wesley said as many as 50 garbage and trash bags containing regurgitated food have been dumped over the past three years. Bags, ranging in size from small white trash bags to large black lawn bags, have been found with only a couple of inches of the substance in them, Wesley said. Why are they even looking in these bags? It's a garbage bag hence it has trash in it. That trash belongs in the garbage. If the bag isn't in the garbage, just move it to the garbage. No need to go on a treasure hunt.

Don't worry -- these crazy Iowan cops know their forensics. They've already sent a sample to the lab for anaylsis. They haven't found any DNA yet nor do they have any suspects. I think the best place to start would be by looking for a local bulemic. Or some creep with a vomit fetish. A bulemic held captive by a skinhead with a vomit fetish. Lindsay Lohan. Lindsay Lohan dressed as a skinhead with a vomit fetish holding herself captive. [source]

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