Chaos Theory

Tom Cruise is going to be on Ellen tomorrow. Set your DVRs and Tivos because even if he doesn't show the long-awaited pictures of his little Suri, chances are he's going to act crazy. Tom Cruise is the car crash I can't stop myself from watching. I don't expect Ellen to hold back unless they put a Scientology spell on her and make her sign some binding contractual agreement for her soul before the show. I don't really care about Suri. All two week old babies look alike anyway. Unless it really is an alien baby. Or if there even is a baby. I just want to see Tom Cruise breakdance.