If it bleeds, it leads

Teri "Skeletor" Hatcher decided to tell a British rag about surfing the Crimson:

Despite being single since her divorce three years ago,

Hatcher is so comfortable with her body,

its cycles have fallen into perfect sync.

She says, "I'm so aligned that

I'm having my period

and I don't even have cramps.

Like haiku, n'est pas? Let's examine this statement for a second, shall we?

• Firstly, a woman who looks like she hasn't eaten since 1986 does not have enough body fat to menstruate.
• Secondly, I think she's, like, 50, and that shit dries up.
• Thirdly, Teri Hatcher is not the role model for healthy body-image, so I doubt she's "comfortable with her body."
• Fourthly, every goddamn woman in the world gets cramps. It doesn't just fall out.
• And finally, what sort of deperate person talks about her period to the press?

Sorry, I'm sensitive today. Off to take a Midol and fun-sized Snickers.

[source]