Car Crashes Are The New Black

Daniel Baldwin was hospitalized Wednesday after his speeding car crashed into two vehicles parked on a Los Angeles street, police said. God, how many Baldwins are there? The actor (he's an actor? really?) complained of back and neck pain and was taken to UCLA Medical Center, said Officer Jason Lee, a police spokesman not the actor. Lee said Baldwin did not appear to be seriously hurt. Authorities said a female passenger, whose name was not released(you can just call her indiscriminant starfucker) was not hurt. Lee said Baldwin, 45, was driving with a suspended license. The actor was detained at the hospital while police investigated the crash, Lee said. Of course, a hospital spokeswoman said she could not confirm that the actor had been treated there. I don't know why they even bother contacting the hospital. The hospital spokesperson is either going to say they "can't confirm" or "nobody by that name is being treated." We've already seen both. Lee said police saw Baldwin's car traveling about 80 mph on the city's west side shortly before 1 p.m. No report on whether or not he was also driving a 1995 Saturn clunker like Hayley Lee Oswald or Donny Jo Osmond or whatever his name is. Baldwin's car reportedly weaved in and out of traffic and ran a red light before striking two parked vehicles. The speed limit in the area is 35 mph, police said. Damn, 80 mph in a 35mph zone--they don't even need to do a blood test -- he was definitely smoking crack. One of the vehicles, a Hummer, was pushed about 20 feet by the impact, Lee said. I wonder if Lindsay Lohan can outdo this car accident before the end of today...[source]