Day At The Beach: Swimsuit Competition

It's a slow-news-day during summer so there's not much to talk about aside from celebrities in bathing suits.

First category: The ass-up pose
Competitors: Jessica Alba and Lindsay Lohan My vote: Jessica Alba all the way. Lindsay has weird curves and she's too pale. Plus, that bruise on the back of her thigh is doing NOTHING for me.

Second category: The Advanced Age Group
Competitors: Teri Hatcher, Pamela Anderson, Rachel Hunter, Courtney Cox and Uma Thurman My vote: Courtney Cox has the most youthful, least fake look out of all of them.

Final Category: The Young’ins
Competitors: Kristin Cavalleri, Lindsay Lohan, Jessica Biel and Mischa BartonMy vote: The old people look better!