SideShow Vergie and Her Traveling Circus

I know I promised I wouldn’t do anymore Anna Nicole Smith posts but alas, it’s my blog and I thought this was too morbidly amusing to ignore. Call me a big old promise breaker if you’d like…the comment section is below.
Start rolling, Anna. Good thing Vergie wore those orthopedic shoes. Someone at that cemetery owes her B$1.53 for her 20 minutes of labor. That was the most entertaining display of old-person stamina EVER. Someone get her a cocktail. Get me one too while you're at it. Glad to see good old Vergie has the coping skills to focus the early-morning loss of her imaginary money tree into something positive. The hole had to be filled, right? Story of her life. snap. Seriously though, I don’t remember making dirt castles during burials. In fact, I don’t remember any dirt. Is this dirt play common? I thought like a priest just sprinkled some on with his little funeral dirt shaker as a symbol. I definitely don’t remember shovels or wheelbarrows. …or is that an actual golf cart with a trunk full of dirt? How delightfully tacky.

PS. They know what killed Anna but they're not going to release it until after the police investigation is completed. I think it was Colonel Mustard in the billard room with the candlestick. I just want the comprehensive story delivered to me in a 1 hour Law and Order episode.