Friday, November 03, 2006

What Would Gay Evangelicals Do? Apparently Hookers and Meth.

Sweet Jesus, I love stories like this:

Rev. Ted Haggard, the leader of the National Association of Evangelicals -- a group representing more than 45,000 churches and 30 million people--and the leader of leadership at New Life Church in Colorado Springs has been accused doing meth and hiring a male prostitute for gay sex. To make matters worse, Haggard is married with children and was supporting a proposed constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage that's on the ballot in Colorado next week.
Obviously,

Evangelism+ gay sex+ wife and kids+ methamphetamine + hookers+ supporting gay marriage amendments = no good.

The hooker decided to out Haggard when he learned Haggard's true identity after he saw him on television and realized Haggard's church supported the proposed constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage. Haggard had told KUSA on Wednesday, "I've never had a gay relationship with anybody. I'm steady with my wife. I'm faithful to my wife." He added, "I have never done drugs, ever -- not even in high school."

Now, he's admitting to the buying the meth (Jesus made him throw it away) and "massages" from the hooker. Um… I'm no theology expert but last time I checked, that's against the Bible.

On TV he says: "Temptation has knocked on my door." Knock Knock. Who's there? Temptation. Temptation, who? A gay prostitute with some meth. Oh, come on in!

Don't worry, God will forgive him. Stay tuned for the rest of the story Jerry Springer style -- there are going to be 'reliable' polygraphs. [source]

1 comment:

xine said...

I was thinking about this -- it reminds me of a roommate I had in college (some of you will remember Jerry) He was a gay, sometimes-evangelical christian from West Virginia. He used to go buckwild and then all of a sudden be born-again Christian then go buckwild again then Christian again... It made my head hurt. Of course when he lived with me he was just buckwild. I often google search his full name as I expect him to be involved with a story like this...