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Couture du Jour: Couture du NO NO

Gosh, it’s been about 10 million and a half centuries since my last post. My apologies to my fan. I have one. She’s part-time. Tuesdays and Thursdays mostly. Anyway, in order to get back into the swing of things, I’m going to write about this horribly disgusting fashion innovation-ish art thing. Categorically, I truthfully don’t know what to call it so horribly disgusting fashion innovation-ish art thing has to work for now. Blog readers, meet eye jewelry by Eric Klarenbeek. See, it’s a contact lens with ugly, dangly beads attached that's supposed to be tre avant garde.

“Eye-jewelry is a project investigating artificial objects which are alien to our body, but actually become or belong to it, like contact lenses. The eye-jewelry is a contact lens which you can really wear, it has no influence on your sight and you don't even feel it. So it fuses with the lens and takes over its function, a symbiose of object and body.”

Um, yeah. In other words, Eric got really fucked up one night with a bunch of his friends and they decided to see if dangling beads off a contact lens would hurt. It didn’t. He packaged it up with some philosophical statement and now hopes to take the art world by storm. Unfortunately Eric didn’t get word that someone already invented weird contacts that scare people. They're usually only purchased by dissociated goth kids' leftover lunch money.

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Celebrity Clone: Battle Of The Bangs Edition

Lily Allen, Mena Suvari and Nelly Furtado look like big banged triplets with their matching brown 'dos. I'm not a fan of the thick bangs but they manage to pull it off. You know, because the alternative was to walk out of the salon looking like this: