Wednesday, March 28, 2007

YOUR 15 MINUTES: You know your substance abuse problem is bad when you mass market new ways to facilitate the abuse

Sick of drinking the same old alcohol and snorting the same old drugs? Here are two stories that challenged my beliefs on potential crackiness of humankind.

Flavored Meth: Makes the Battery Acid Taste Like Chocolate Battery Acid (Your Kids Will Love It - Just in Time for Easter)

Now I’ve heard of mixing Strawberry Quick with drugs (thanks Lindsay Lohan) but meth cooks cooked up a whole new idea in their little clandestine labs. They actually bake flavors (like strawberry, chocolate and soda) into the drugs. Law enforcement and some experts think flavor has been added to make the drug more appealing to children. Just like regular meth, the flavored versions can be broken up into a powder and snorted with a straw, can be smoked or can be reliquified and injected intravenously. Gross. Dr. Alex Stalcup is a nationally renowned drug counselor who has just started seeing teenage patients at the New Leaf Treatment Center who have suffered the ill effects of flavored meth. One of the patients was unaware the substance was meth at all and was told it was a solidified form of the energy drink Red Bull, Stalcup said. Um…yeah right. I don’t believe that kid for a second. Nice excuse though – QUICK thinking. In response to this story, I propose to coin a new drug term - pop rocks. Candy flavored meth is clearly pop rocks and it's so much catchier than "quick meth."

PS. I thought I had to give my passport at the pharmacy and get presidential approval for cold medicine so there wouldn’t be a meth problem in the US anymore. Oh yeah, that’s right…laws like that don’t work. They inconvenience consumers while allowing drug manufacturers and traffickers to often pursue more violent and often foreign means of maintaining the trade.

The AWOL Machine - Attacking America's Obesity Problem One Alcoholic at a Time.

Want to drink but don’t actually want to drink? There's a new low-calorie, low-carbohydrate way for adults to consume alcohol and you don't even need a glass. It's AWOL, Alcohol With Out Liquid, and for the first time, it is available in The United States after successful debuts in Europe and Asia. AWOL consists of two components: an oxygen generator and a hand-held vaporizer. Tubes from the generator attach to the vaporizer. The user chooses an 80-proof spirit, which is poured into the vaporizer. Oxygen mixes with the alcohol producing a mist which is inhaled through the mouth. Alcohol enters the bloodstream through the lungs rather than the stomach making AWOL low calorie and low carbohydrate. The resulting feeling is the same sense of well being an adult gets from consuming alcohol in the traditional manner, only milder. Once the alcohol enters the bloodstream, it affects the body in the same way as drinking alcohol. Additionally, the alcohol leaves the body in the same manner as if it had been consumed by drinking. "One of the ways alcohol leaves the body is through the mouth," Morse said. "Therefore, contrary to reports, the alcohol will definitely register on the Intoxylizer 5000, commonly called the Breathalyzer test which is used by law-enforcement officials to apprehend drivers who are under the influence of alcohol." A Single User Awol Machine - Only $299 Plus $15 Shipping.

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