Vintage Charlize Theron

Puff, Puff, Pass, Charlize!

Sasha Goin' Gold

Every few hours for the past twelve days my digital cable reminds me that the Olympics is on NBC. Up until last night's figure skating competition I didn't really care but luckily I turned on NBC to see the last three figure skaters compete. American cutie, Sasha Cohen (who I had seriously confused with Ali G actor Sacha Baron Cohen until about a month ago) kicked some Russian bootay when she outskated Irina "I'm-so-glad-I-don't-have-your-last-name" Slutskaya, the world's #1 skater, beating her by .03 points.

My boyfriend and I will be tuning in (along with a majority of the gay male population and female senior citizen population) for Thursday's four-minute free skate, where Slutskaya's better track record will make for a good few hours of primetime figure skating drama. Until then you'll find me practicing my triple Salchow- triple toe loop combination my living room.

Million Dollar Mess

Stefan Ericksson, 44, Swedish game industry mogul and alleged Swedish mafia associate, escaped a sensational Pacific Coast Highway crash with a cut lip. His $1,000,000+, 660-horsepower, red Enzo Ferrari wasn't so lucky. The car, traveling at over 100 miles per hour, crashed into a power pole and shattered while supposedly taking part in a Malibu street race (talk about mid-life crisis behavior). The engine came to rest on the highway while the rest of the car scattered in pieces. Ericksson told police he was the passenger and the driver was his German acquaintance he knew only as Dietrich, who he said ran into the nearby hills. A three-hour search failed to turn up "Dietrich" and police were skeptical of the account. Ericksson had a blood-alcohol level of .09, slightly more than the legal .08 limit (I hope those two beers were worth it!). “He destroyed one of the finest cars on earth, maybe the finest,” said Ferrari owner Chris Banning, a Beverly Hills writer, "It’s like taking a Van Gogh painting and burning it.” [source]

Stefan Ericksson is a good guy whether he knows it or not. Now only approx. 397 Enzo Ferraris exist (this wasn't the first demise of an Enzo) allowing 397 innocent, careful Ferrari drivers to increase their assets by doing nothing, which is probably what these million-dollar car owners do all day anyway, Tommy Hilfiger and Nicolas Cage being two of them. I also think it was terribly nice of him to allow this imaginary German fellow, Dietrich, to be the designated race car driver of the million-dollar piece of metal. It doesn't take Scooby Doo to figure out this guy doesn't exist. What a great scapegoat -- a German man without a last name crashes a million dollar car and runs off into the California Hills disappearing into the spectacular sunset never to be seen or heard from again. Sucks to be Stefan's insurance company.

Boycotting Bond

Apparently it took some time to shake and stir some James Bond fans after the announcement that Daniel Craig will be replacing Pierce Brosnan as the next James Bond. In a rather delayed fashion, they've launched a website Craig Not Bond asking James Bond fans to boycott the upcoming Casino Royale movie.

I'm calling for James Bond fans to boycott the movie not because Pierce Brosnan isn't in it, but because it's blatantly obvious this movie is going to be a $100-million piece of poo. They have this relatively unknown, greasy-looking, blonde Brit playing Bond, a French girl named Eva Green with yellow teeth as a Bond girl and 'the sexiest man in...Denmark' cast as the villain. Yes, this movie is going to be so bad they had to go to Denmark, the geographically smallest and southernmost Nordic country, to find someone willing to sign on as Le Chiffre. I believe it would be far more entertaining to do anything other than watch this movie....like spend your $9 on crappy, crispy popcorn shrimp from Popeyes Chicken and Biscuits (drive-thru) and eat them while watching the scariness of Teri Hatcher's face on HDTV.

Crack is Whack

Here's Whitney singing at the Olympic games in Torino.
Click here for audio of the performance. Apparently, her voice left something to be desired... and that outfit grrl??!?! I think I saw a vest from the GAP once that had nicer fur.

"The Queen is back," was how Whitney was apparently introduced by the Italian host, but according to Tu, it was "a tragic event from the moment she stepped onto the outdoor stage." First off, there was the outfit: Even though there were reports that the diva would be wearing a Russian fur for her anticipated Olympic one-off, it looked to our eyewitness as more "faux synthetic" than "pelle lux." And with it, she had on a cream turtleneck and ill-fitting white nylon pants.

"Don't you just hate it when apres-ski whites don't match?"
So, about the singing. Starting off with Greatest Love of All, Whitney "coughed, sniffled and talked her way through the song." She motioned a cough attack and, struggling, asked the audience, "Why did they choose to do this outdoors? I don't sing in the cold. It makes my voice funny," and then made the international hand-gesture for "crazy."

[source]

********************

UPDATE.... here's a pic of Whitney and Bobby leaving Torino.
meow meow sad, meow meow.

Birthday ALARM

Actress Drew Barrymore is 31.

Actress Julie Walters (Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, Billy Elliot) is 56.
Actor Kyle MacLachlan is 47.
Naturalist Steve Irwin (The Crocodile Hunter) is 44.
Comedian Rachel Dratch (Saturday Night Live) is 40.
Actress Jeri Ryan (Boston Public, Star Trek: Voyager') is 38.
Actor Thomas Jane (The Sweetest Thing) is 37.
Actor Jose Solano (Baywatch) is 35.
Actress Lea Solanga is 35.
Actor Daniel E. Smith (John Q.) is 16.

FASHION FIX: Cavalli Tax Catastrophe

The master of tacky designer animal print frocks, Roberto Cavalli, is facing tax fraud charges in Italy. Roberto wrote off home renovations as a business expense, spending $2.7 million on renovations to his $18 million mansion at Pian dei Giullari where he lives with his wife and children (I know, he's not gay. That's totally weird). Roberto claims "My house is not my home - it's my workplace, it's my office, it's my imagination and where I have fashion shoots. It's the place where Madonna, Sting, Cindy Crawford and Jennifer Lopez try the clothes that I create. It's where I welcome my most important clients.”...and in HIS IMAGINATION those write-offs were business related dammit!

He could be facing up to 2 years in jail which will not be a good thing for his Spring 2007-Fall 2009 collections. Even though he'd be doing his hard, tax-evading time in Italy, I'm pretty sure those jails aren't going to be a good 'office for his imagination'. I can't see Madonna doing a Grammy dress fitting behind bars.

See, I don't find it hard to believe that he's so disillusioned that he thinks spending $2.7 million to make his house nicer is a necessary business-related expense--since he welcomes Madonna, Sting, Cindy Crawford and Jennifer Lopez to his home to try on clothes. He calls it business, I call it "drinking a little wine and playing a little dress up." Semantics. I guess if Jenny from the Block was coming to my house to try on clothes I'd want to do a little $2.7 million overhaul too. What surprises me about this whole thing is that Roberto Cavalli does his own taxes. I don't even do my own taxes. He lives in an $18 million mansion, runs a fashion house, owns a café in Milan and does his own taxes? Shouldn't he have some calculator-carrying minion to blame this on? [source]

God Love The New Yorker!

Watch-Your-Back Mountain!

In Case You Thought The Wave Was Missing.....

I FOUND IT...

This is Mariah accepting an award at today's TRL Awards. And just when you thought Mariah could go one performance without that GODDAMN hand waving around, she does it AGAIN. I saw what she does when she performed on the Grammy's... first she holds the mic with her left hand and waves her right... then, TRICK!!! she switches, and holds the mic with her right, waving with her left. I know this is slowly approaching nuculear science, so I'll stop.

I'm tired just watching. And, and, is anyone else thinking, "Enough with the butterfly ring, Mariah!" The love has come and gone for that ring and the whole butterfly thing needs to go. STAT.

Otherwise, Mimi, keep up the crazy!

YOUR 15 MINUTES: Pubic Hair Prenup?

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Winner: Most Random Story-of-the-Day

Jeffrey Fulvimari, the artist responsible for the artwork of Madonna's children's book, The English Roses, was hospitalized over the weekend after being BEAT THE FUCK UP while leaving a trendy nightclub early Sunday morning in NYC.

He's being treated at a local hospital and is said to be undergoing reconstructive surgery on his left eye socket after being beaten and kicked.

"I'm lucky I don't have brain damage or hearing damage."

I feel 10 times dumber for having written this story...

[source]

Godhusbands!

Jake Gyllenhaal has accepted Heath Ledger's invitiation to be god-father to baby Matilda. The two claim to have created a lasting friendship during the filming of Brokeback Mountain.

"Heath and I are best friends now, making the film was very intense for us," Jake said. "I'm actually godfather to Heath's daughter Matilda which is an amazing honor."

Heath has decided to take some time to enjoy his new role as dad, saying that he's succumb to the joys of domesticity, "My life right now is, I wouldn't say reduced to food, butmy duties in life are that I wake up, cook breakfast, clean the dishes, prepare lunch, clean those dishes, go to the market, get fresh produce, cook dinner, clean those dishes and then sleep if I can... And I love it. I actualy adore it."

i think i'm in love.

[source]

Prince Charles Not Gay, Just Wants Some Privacy

Prince Charles took legal action today against a newspaper that published excerpts from his personal diary. In excerpts entitled, "The Handover of Hong Kong" or "The Great Chinese Takeaway," (referring to the 1997 handover of the British colony of Hong Kong to China) he called Chinese diplomats "appalling old waxworks." He is suing at the High Court for breach of confidentiality and copyright in a case aimed at determining whether members of the British royal family are entitled to the same level of privacy as other members of the public. Charles claims the diaries were copied by a former staff member and given to the newspaper. The prince's lawyer, Hugh Tomlinson, also asked for the return of seven other diaries allegedly copied by the employee. "We are not dealing with state secrets," Tomlinson said. "We are dealing with an ordinary type of personal journal of the type that any citizen might make in respect of a foreign trip, recording thoughts and impressions. [source]

Really Charles? No secrets in your journal? You’re suing because you made a Madame Tussaud's comment about some China men? You’re definitely NOT suing because you wrote about the long-time, secret, rumored affair with your former aide Michael Fawcett and you don’t want it to be in the press, right? You’re not hiding the fact that you’re bisexual are you? And that you're rumored to sometimes dress in women’s clothing (and I’m not talking about kilts here people)? See, this is just some gossip I’ve heard about you over the years and it all sounds like rumors you wouldn't want to be confirmed by the public, as it might tarnish your royal reputation. One other thing, I've always wondered if Camille was really born a female. She wasn’t one of those hermaphrodite children that was born with both female and male genitalia so they chopped off the man parts and raised her a female, was she? I’d really like it if you could clear that up for me.

Britney needs her 'mom license' revoked

Here's more of what Britney had to say to People magazine about her "unfortunate" baby-on-the-lap-while-driving incident:

I love my baby more than anything," she says. "And as unfortunate an experience as this has been for me and my family, if it brings more attention to child safety, then I fully support that."

Forget about state-funded million dollar safety campaigns, according to Britney Spears all we need to do is have her drive around with her baby on her lap to raise public awareness on child passenger safety and the importance of child safety seats. She supports using her fame to put her child in danger to help save other less-famous children. Maybe next she can get all liquored up, drive around in the Ferrari she bought her husband and crash into a telephone pole cutting out Paris Hilton's electricity. Britney can then speak out about the dangers of driving drunk while Paris can speak about the importance of electricity.

Birthday ALARM

Actress Jennifer Love Hewitt is 27.

Actress Rue McClanahan is 71.
Actor Kelsey Grammer is 51.
Singer Mary Chapin Carpenter is 48.
Actor Jack Coleman is 48.
Actor Christopher Atkins is 45.
Actor William Baldwin is 43.
Country singer Eric Heatherly is 36.
Bassist Eric Wilson of Sublime is 36.
Bassist Tad Kinchla of Blues Traveler is 33.
Opera singer Charlotte Church is 20.

Quite the Ensemble

This here is The New York Times magazine's way of "saluting the performances that moved, surprised and thrilled us, regardless of whether they were nominated for awards." This is the third year the magazine has acknowledged actors that may have gone a bit under the radar, as well as those that have captivated audiences all over the world.

The photographs were taken by Inez van Lamsweerde and Vinoodh Matadin.
click here for the entire story...

Daniel Day-Lewis | The Ballad of Jack and Rose

Jeff Daniels | The Squid and the Whale

Penélope Cruz | Don't Move

Eric Bana | Munich

Deep Roy | Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

Natalie Press and Emily Blunt | My Summer of Love

Terrence Howard | Hustle & Flow

Joaquin Phoenix | Walk the Line

Reese Witherspoon | Walk the Line

Joseph Gordon-Levitt | Mysterious Skin

Bill Murray | Broken Flowers

Vera Farmiga | Down to the Bone

Philip Seymour Hoffman | Capote

Amy Adams | Junebug

Heath Ledger | Brokeback Mountain

Michelle Williams | Brokeback Mountain

Viggo Mortensen | A History of Violence

Charlize Theron | North Country

Shirley MacLaine | In Her Shoes

Birol Ünel and Sibel Kekilli | Head-On

Rachel Weisz | The Constant Gardener

William Hurt | A History of Violence

Ziyi Zhang | 2046

George Clooney | Syriana

Birthday ALARM

Model Cindy Crawford is 40.

Actor James Wilby ("Gosford Park") is 48.
Bassist Sebastian Steinberg (Soul Coughing) is 47.
Actor Joel Hodgson ("Mystery Science Theater 3000") is 46.
Singer Ian Brown of Stone Roses is 43.
Actor French Stewart ("Third Rock From the Sun") is 42.
Actor Andrew Shue ("Melrose Place") is 39.
Actress Lili Taylor is 39.
Singer Brian Littrell of Backstreet Boys is 31.
Actress Lauren Ambrose ("Six Feet Under") is 28.
Actor Jay Hernandez ("Crazy/Beautiful") is 28.
Actress Majandra Delfino ("Roswell") is 25.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAA KILL IT!

Can anyone tell me exactly when Carrot Top became a tranny?!
This was taken two days ago at the opening night of "Hairspray" in Las Vegas.

Seeing Double

I swear, the minute she takes off that leotard, she's wearing a dress that Drew Barrymore already wore to the Golden Globes.

Straighten' up!

Paris turned Lamps off!

I guess that eight foot bouquet of flowers with fake butterflies on it wasn't enough to keep Paris' heart and hands on her boyfriend Stavros. At a Brit-Awards after party, Paris tried to tackle soccer hunk Frank Lampard. Paris first tried to get her grubby little hands on him at the Warner Music party, held after Wednesday’s Brits in a grand private home close to Kensington Palace. Frank, who has a child with his girlfriend Elen Rives, had a small chat with Paris and gave her his number and high-tailed it out of Paris' death trap.

This is where the story gets good: Paris then proceeded to go after party-hopping to track him down presumably for a little of what Miss Hilton does best -- give a guy a night in Paris. She then sampled Kanye West’s Cristal champagne-popping celebrations at Movida before finally ending up at the EMI knees-up in the swanky Baglioni Hotel. There she climbed on a table to dance in the darkened club — and to get a better view of the guests. Paris then made her second move of the night on Frank with the only sentence she knows how to formulate in her head: “Hi, you’re here, that’s so hot.” She then told him to stay right there while she ran to the ladies room -- and he sprinted for the door with his friends! Good boy! Bitch is PSYCHO! Paris gets rejected -- what a great birthday present! [source]